Sunday, March 29, 2015

Random


I took some pictures of Mia and Christopher. Mia is so used to having her picture taken that she just goes with it.
    Babette Lässer Photography

I just love this gif because it's stupid.

We signed Joshua's contract so he can start his apprenticeship in August as a bike mechanic in a really fun but chaotic place. I kept my cool while I was there but started crying like a mom in the car.


I could have sworn that I had freezer paper so I tore up the craft room to find it and then had to clean it up -- never did find the damn paper.
Finally got the silhouette machine kind of figured out and got the peace sign cut out for this pillow. It only took me a whole roll of vinyl, 6 tries, (one of which involved ironing the damn thing to a dish towel because I had it laying down the wrong way) and a bunch of nice ladies on facebook talking me through it.
 
The littlest one is sick again with a sore throat -- at first we feared it was scarlet fever (yes we still have that sickness here; at least it ain't the damn measles) but turns out it's just a virus of some sort.
 Aren't they perfect? I should know, I made two of them.

Subject of this shooting was dance like nobody's watching. This was a little hard because if I really danced like nobody is watching, I would had been put in the hospital for body spasms. What you can't hear is how weird the music is. The mat I am standing on really hurt my feet. Every time I raised my arms my stomach would pop out.
This was our loveshack pose that was not intentional; we were just being stupid. The funny thing is that Jannik is actually way over 6ft and here he looks like a Dwarf.
Those shoes were absolutely killing me.
Both of these pictures were taken by my talented friend Babette Lässer.



The cool dude lying on the floor is my friend Flo, who takes amazing pictures every time except, this time he had 50 pictures left after taking almost 1000 .They had bad lighting and he was ready to beat someone up. That is why we do this, so they get practice and I get nice pictures. I get better every time, too, even though that is not why I do it -- it's just a nice side effect.
Alright that is all I have; I have to go make taco salad.

Take care,
Julia

Monday, March 23, 2015

Brussels

This weekend we took a road trip to Brussels to visit some family who decided to spend part of their honeymoon there.
I started to get suspicious when, every person I told where we were going, asked me why. I had never been to Belgium and I am always up for seeing something new so I ignored it.
Now that I have been there, I understand why people were looking at me funny when I told them where I was going.

I will say that the trip was worth it just to see Kyle and Ashley, but other than that, I can hereby promise that Brussels will never see me again, unless I have to drive through it to get somewhere else.
We got to our hotel, which was the Novotel Centre Noire in downtown Brussels around 7:30 pm, after driving through insane traffic. Seriously, people drive like crazy people there; unfortunately, there is practically no room to park anywhere in that whole city and our hotel also had no parking so we parked in the Parking garage across the street!

This was the view out of our window.
After we got to the top floor the first thing we saw were hookers, so Christopher was automatically starting to wig out about his car and whether or not someone was going to key it or break in.
Since we got in so late we had to get the kids fed so we went to McDonalds because it was quick. Little did we know that we would be going there more often that weekend.
We got the kids fed and met up with Kyle and Ashley for drinks in the hotel and hung out till around 1am then went up to bed. I didn't sleep well. :-) That is not unusual. I don't usually sleep well the first night in a new place.
The next morning we met up around 10 to go sightseeing and shopping, which is where we realized that everything is twice as expensive there than it is at home -- that includes everything, especially food and alcohol.
Famous Belgian waffle that Christopher said sucked. lol! I swear it was a disaster! What you can't see is the dude dressed up as a bunny waving around a huge brown dildo and having his picture taken.


 
It was so damn cold there that we had to keep going into places for coffee and drinks to warm up, but Mia was still a trooper though. 

 

 
The first day we spent walking around buying our souvenirs and going to dinner at ChiChi's. Just FYI don't ever go to the ChiChi's in Brussels, just don't. 

 
Here is a fun fact about Brussels: Regular people just pee in the streets there, just for the hell of it, so every once in a while you get a big whiff of urine, which always helps the overall vibe. 
Another fact is that the sweets, and by that I mean the chocolate, are out of this world. 

I went to a Lady Godiva store, where I bought nothing because I couldn't decide. 
Sunday was the day that we were heading back so we decided to go see the Atomium and head home from there. 
 This was our only family picture that weekend.











 
We headed home around 2:30 and walked in the door at home at 7:30 after just one, stop so that wasn't too bad. All in all, I am really glad that I got to see Kyle and Ashley. 

 
Our trip:
4 trips to McDonalds
3,00 euros spent on the bathroom 
29,00 euros on parking
really bad mexican food
lots of laughs with the newlyweds
a wonderful snack bag
rustly sheets that woke us up every time Mia turned over in bed, which was every 5 minutes
a shitload of homeless people
more cops than I can count; they were seriously everywhere
some very strange people

Talk to you later,
Julia


Saturday, March 14, 2015

Put some damn clothes on

I grew up in Germany where kids swam naked in the lake and the pool till it was too indecent to do so, or until one kid too many took a dump in the kiddie pool.
But, I had two parents who did not grow up that way and in our house when you took a shower, changed your clothes or went to the bathroom, you did it with the door closed and in private. If my mom was in the tub and I knocked on the door then I was always welcome but I usually just waited.
I didn't feel like I missed out on anything but I guess growing up that way has made it impossible for me to go to a mixed sauna or any other activity where I have to be naked in public, and by public, I mean in a sauna, not outside on the street.
I just can't do it......and it makes me break out in hives just thinking about taking off my clothes and crossing a room to get in the pool or a steam room.

Now, let me tell you what happened to me today:

My nasty friend, Babette, who knows about my naked-people phobia, asked me to go swimming with her today. I said "yes" because I never get out and I need the exercise.
We get to the place and I start to panic once I realize she is leading me to the changing room, where all the women take their clothes off together. I instantly get mad and tell her I am not doing it so she tells me she will meet me out by the pool. I take my bag, jacket, big-ass towel and my shoes and run out of there. I change in private and go to put my clothes in the locker, only to realize that I can't lock it without the card that I have for the Sauna. I am so screwed, so now I am in my Bikini and I have all my stuff on my arm and push myself back through the turnstyle thing with all my shit and go back in the free-for-all changing room -- Babette is gone.
I put all my crap in a locker and stick the card in the slot to lock it.....and it doesn't work.
I take everything out and move to the next locker; I get everything in and the wristband breaks off of the key.
I am starting to sweat on my ladystache.
I move over to the next one and get everything in -- by now I am ready to bite someone.......it won't lock.
Now, Babette calls me from outside of the locker room and comes in and locks the g**damn door.
We get out and all these old people are in the pool and they are swimming towards each other like a bunch of minnows with no idea what the F**K they are doing. So, there is no way I am getting in the pool because I have issues with something touching me under water, and besides I have serious road rage. Can you imagine me in a pool with a bunch of people swimming around like they don't care?
I watch her for a while from the side while she is telling me to get in the damn water.......not happening. People are looking at me now because I am the only one outside of the pool.
 
I sashay over to the kiddie pool, get in there, and watch the other pool from the side like a stalker because that is what I do when I act like a child.
Finally, it's time to go to the sauna and that is when I find out that it is mixed.
OH HELL TO THE NO!!!!!
Babette just looks at me like there is something seriously wrong with me at this point and I don't understand how she can be so nonchalant about it. She strips butt-ass naked right there in the hallway. 
This is me:
 
I start sweating again and trying to figure out what to do, when this larger man walks past me completely naked and I almost hyperventilate. 
"Okay Julia get your shit together"! I am screaming at myself on the inside while I am telling my friend that I hate her, she just rolls her eyes at me.
I took off my bikini and got into the sauna and sweated my ass off, and I even enjoyed it a little. 
After we got out an hour later all the little minnows had gone off to eat and I got to swim my lanes and exercise in the grown up pool, which was nice. 
I might go again next week if they ever let me back in. 
Just FYI: I showered with my bottoms on and my flip flops; let's not get carried away here. 

Later, 
Julia





Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Random Thoughts

Random thoughts that go through my head:

My house smells like pancakes.

I am getting tired of wearing socks.

My eyebrows look like they are falling out.

I really like the first season of Supernatural.

Why isn't my Spotify playlist the same on all of my devices?

I haven't read a good book in a long time.

My pants are too tight.

I love Ray Lamontagne. I think he is my spirit animal and he is probably singing to me when he sings "Let it be me."

I think I should comb my hair the next time I post a YouTube video of my crazy ass
here

I need to not be afraid of my stupid silhouette machine and just have at it already.

I could be skinny already  if I had started exercising when I said I would.

I diet like I do everything else: for three days and then I quit because it gets boring and hard.

I need to cut my roses so they bloom this spring/summer.

We have been together 9 years and he still thinks I'm nuts, but now he is used to it.

Mia likes to drink bathwater; I think it's disgusting and that might be why she barfed in her bed at 3 am.

I hate cleaning up barf at three in the morning.


 If someone spoke to me as nastily as I do to myself, I would probably punch them in the throat.

I would like to punch someone in the throat just to see what it feels like, maybe someone like a child molester, not a good person.

Talk to you later,
Julia

Friday, March 6, 2015

My week in pictures

If you buy yourself a new lipstick that you have been researching for 2 months on the internet, then for all that is holy, do not leave that sucker lying on the table where your 3 year old can get to it.

I forgot last time when I started Paleo that you get a really bad headache the first week; I remember that now.


I was reminded again how happy I am to have two girls who are both hilarious.
Mia had her annual checkup and she almost fell off the table. She refused to talk to the doctor until he was halfway out the door, then she told him "Bye."
This is how we hang on the couch; everyone has headphones except Mia, because she watches those really annoying videos where some strange woman unwraps toys.
Christopher was in Dubai for several days soaking up the sun. He had fun but you can't really tell by looking at this picture. :-)
Mia and I slept in one bed and I was kicked in the face every night, but this is how she woke me up in the morning -- totally worth it!
Enya and I did a lot of chopping and cutting this weekend in the hopes that this year the wisteria will bloom; it hasn't in three years.
 Mia got a kinder egg that is as big as her head

We made little cakes with sprinkles in them in a silicone pan that was so awesome that I will only be buying those pans from now on. Nothing sticks in them.
This was 2 minutes after she was talking, telling me she wasn't tired. She's a liar.

Take care,
Julia

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