Sunday, November 16, 2014

Things I have learned

This week is a little different; I am going to tell you about the all the things that I learned last night.
A little back story: We went to eat goose, which is a German tradition to have Martinsgans.  Because I have never had goose, I decided this was a great idea and we should definitely do it.
To get to this location you are required to hike through the woods for about 30-45 minutes, depending on how fast you go. During the day this hike is really fun because of the beautiful scenery -- this place is really in the middle of nowhere.

1) I learned that even though it's raining like there is no tomorrow, and I am walking uphill sweating and breathing like a cow, I can still hold a conversation much to my husband's annoyance. He kept making fun of me for sounding like a dying cow. We did see a salamander, which was way cool.

2) I learned that it is a waste of time to do your hair if you are going to be wearing a hood and walking in the rain because afterwards, you will look like an ass with wet hair. There are no words for my face but I do usually look like this.


3) You shouldn't carry a leather purse in the rain. I was told, though, that the constant wetness on the leather would give it a certain patina that would be interesting. (Good one. I don't think so, but nice try.)

4) I don't like goose.

5) If you eat all the chestnuts on your plate, you will be full because chestnuts stuff you like a pigeon eating rice. Then you can't eat the rest of the stuff on your plate.

6) I like to take purposely take pictures with my double chin showing.

7) I know nothing about wine except to say what I like and what I don't like, but that is where my expertise ends. I don't even try to fake it either and try to taste berries or some other shit.
Even if this looks like I didn't like the wine, I did.

8)  I learned that if 16 people who are in various levels of being plowed walk down a hill in almost total darkness while it is still raining, there is a very good chance that somebody is going to fall down, multiple times, and the chance that they will be made fun of is very high, especially if yours truly is there. 
All you can see is frantic flashlights all over the place and I can hear maniacal laughter in the woods. It's Blair Witch Project without the killing.

9) If you think you can sneak off to pee in the woods, there is always someone who points a flashlight on you to find out what you are doing.

10) You can fit three 6 foot people on the back bench of a grand voyager and it's hilarious to see them try to get out the car.

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