Monday, September 22, 2014

Things I Learned

If you are looking at purses and you come across the term "Vegan Leather", don't buy it! It is effing plastic and worse than anything -- I actually think it's evil.

Don't make rash decisions about your hair. If you have some dumb-ass idea about cutting it or coloring it, then please sleep on it for a week or at least until you are no longer hormonal and stupid and then do it or don't.  In my case I shouldn't have done it.
I decided to color my hair and add some brown highlights and I did write about hating it because the color just looked all wrong. I couldn't figure out why . . . . . . well, now I know.  I am completely gray!  All over my damned head . . . . . not a couple of little hairs, but my whole head!

I bought a big inflatable kitty for my garage roof for Halloween.  When I plugged it in, I  broke it. It can be fixed but it's still a pain in the ass.  I learned that if it says 120v then don't plug it into 220v, you dumbass!

If you need a good laugh then check out this video.
I almost peed my pants.

I learned that if you have a head cold, you probably shouldn't be out in public. I only know this because I tried to put on two pairs of pants on top of each other and didn't understand why it didn't work. I went outside but checked first if I was wearing all my clothes just in case I wore two pairs of pants and no shirt.

Don't start reading a fan fiction website on a tv show you like. You will not be able to stop for two days and everybody in your family will hate you, because they get sandwiches and a dirty house. You are so busy reading that you can't function properly.

I now know not to make chicken fajitas and try to melt the cheese in a sandwich maker. It doesn't work and it makes a really huge mess.

It is impossible to keep a tired toddler awake.


Saturday, September 13, 2014

I Apologize

Today I am going to apologize to all the strangers that I have pissed off in the last couple of days, just to get it off my chest.

I apologize to the car behind me that was forced to watch my turn signal blink for eternity because I couldn't hear it over my screeching rendition of "Burn" from Ellie Goulding. Then again, it's not really my fault that my car doesn't turn off the signal automatically.

I apologize to the doctor for leaving a weird, breathy message on your answering machine. I didn't realize it was on yet and when I did, I got flustered and babbled. Then again, it's not really my fault because the beep could have been louder.

I apologize to the lady behind me at the grocery store who was breathing down my neck since she only had three items and really wanted to get out of the store to get on with her important life. Well, guess what: sometimes I let people get in front of me and sometimes I am an asshole, so today was not your lucky day.  I guess that was a sucky apology . . . . . . oh well, moving on.

I apologize to my kids. I tried to tell them that they will freeze their butts off if they wear shorts and a t-shirt to school when it is rainy and windy and just downright nasty outside. I forgot: they are the masters of the universe and they never get sick. I will remind them of that when they sound like idiots because their nose is so stopped up with snot. Then again, I never listened either until NEVER so whatever.

I apologize to the summer plants that I really want to throw away now since fall is here and I want to put out pumpkins. Pumpkins and pretty pink flowers don't match, so please die already.

I apologize to my hairdresser who I went to twice in one week and told I hated my hair. She has now told me if I dye it again, my hair will probably fall out. Good thing she is my oldest friend or I would have smacked her.

I apologize to my hormones because I hate you so much.  I see how vindictive and shitty you are. Pimples at 39? WTF!!!! Oh yeah, and my hair is weird, too. Thanks for nothing!

I apologize to my siblings because mom loves me the most. I am secretly her favorite even if she says otherwise.

I apologize to my husband because it is getting cold at night. You better get ready for my freezing feet to be shoved between your legs when I get into bed. That is your job; it says so in the marriage handbook, right next to telling me I am beautiful everyday and buying me whatever the hell I want.

I apologize to the rain because I hate you so much. Blah Blah, it makes shit grow. If it wasn't for you my damned summer flowers would be dead, not to mention, my hair can't hold a curl in this nasty-ass weather. Save the planet and all that other crap.

Okay, getting all that guilt off my chest really made me feel better about myself.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Happy Birthday oldest child

Your Birthday was on Monday, which also happened to be on the first day of school. That was kind of  dumb and I'm sorry for that, but you got through it like you always do.
You were my first kid and the one I made the most mistakes with like, pulling your seatbelt too tight and, in a panic, cutting the seatbelt to get you out.
I put you in daycare at 3 weeks old and you were still the happiest baby on the planet. To this day I still have mom guilt about that.
I yelled at you (and still do a lot) but now you just laugh at me.
I used to make you help me move furniture that was too heavy for both of us.
I made you wear sockpants in the winter.
Even though I did all these things, you still love me and tell me you wouldn't want another mom.
I must have done something right because you are the best kid ever, even when you are acting like a total teenager and I only see you when you are passing through to eat and sleep.
I am grateful for everyday with you, even if I don't always act that way.
I love you,

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Sunday in wine country

Today we decided to go walking a little bit and get something to eat and drink at a little cabin in the middle of the woods  called Wallberghütte in Deidesheim but of course it was an adventure like always. We had no idea where we were going and we ended up walking about 3 miles through the wilderness with a 2 year old before we got to where we wanted to go and were so thirsty that we ordered big White grape spritzes and chugged them.
We did get there eventually but on the way back we took a shortcut and it only took us half the time running downhill.

Red wine as a baby, awwww isn't it cute?

Mia walked for a long time and had fun looking at lizards, bugs and finding walking sticks she does great once you get her out of the house.
Enya pretty much ran the whole time I don't know where she gets the energy but in the end her legs were giving in and she was ready to be carried.
It was nice to get out in the fresh air even if it was hot outside and I was sweating like crazy but I live in such a beautiful area that its nice to be reminded of that every once on a while.

Monday, September 8, 2014

My favorite photo apps

When it was time to get a new phone my biggest criteria was the camera on it so after researching it I decided to get the Sony Xperia Z1 because it has by far the best camera on a cellphone with 20,7 megapixel.
I really love the fact that it is water/dust proof which came in handy at the Holifestival and at other times when I layed it down on a wet counter.
I don't like to talk on the phone with it because it is a big phone and doesn't feel right in my little hand but everything else is great as far as texting, Internet or playing games.
At first I had every photoapp you can imagine but after having it for a year I have 3 that I use all the time.
The best thing in my opinion is to take the picture with the plain camera and then work on it with the different apps because the photos are just better at least I think they are.
My favorite app for selfies or pictures of people is the Candy camera app.

This is taken with the plain camera no filter nothing edited


This is with Candy Camera
There are two different sets of filter with this app, Selfies and Classic and I use them both

Picsart is the other App that I use quite a bit, I make my header for my blog with it and all of my collages and they are the right size for Instagram also so I don't have to cut my picture.

I am a big Instagram junkie but the cutting my pictures into a square really gets on my nerves until I found NoCrop.

With this app I can upload every picture to Instagram without cutting it but it does add a white frame around every picture that you can't see once it is on Instagram because of the white background.
It also has collages, stickers and cute frames so you have quite a bit to work with.

I even upload my pictures from my camera to my phone and add filters because I like it so much

Edited with Candy Camera

If you click on the pictures it takes you to the Playstore so you can download them and try them yourself.

Sunday, September 7, 2014

It's Been a Year

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep. 
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight On the ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain. 
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight. 
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there. I did not die.
~by Mary Elizabeth Frye

A year ago today my Dad passed away and even though I am not a religious person, I am going to tell you how my belief got me through.
I don't write about religion because it is a very personal subject but because I write mostly personal stuff I thought I would make an exception.
I am not a religious person, I do not ever go to church, not because I am against it but because I don't feel the need to be there or go there to be close to God.
As long as I can remember I have been spiritual but never religious. To tell you the truth, there is quite a bit in the bible that is off-putting to me and always has been, at least since I had it all through school as a main subject that I had to take. I remember once in trade school: a teacher got so pissed at me for questioning his teachings that he screamed at me and threw my stuff out the window, making himself look stupid and convincing me even more that this was not my way to go.
I have read a lot of books over the years about death, reincarnation and the afterlife;  I have always lived by the rule that you reap what you sow, and if you are mean and spiteful, it will come back and bite you in the ass threefold.
I believe that free will is the greatest gift we have and as a little helpful tool we also received intuition; and if you ignore it then you will be sorry because it will never steer you wrong. However, ignoring it will force you learn the hard way every time.
I believe in Heaven and angels and spirits and ghosts and I also believe that we are all here for a reason and that life is the trial and Heaven is the reward.
I believe everything you send out in the world will multiply and come back, no matter if it's good or bad, so be careful what you pray for.
I didn't realize how deep my belief was until Dad died and I had to deal with the finality of it.
When Dad died, I wasn't sad for him, I was sad for myself.  I did worry about him not being ready or being too surprised by how fast that he went that he was maybe confused and not ready to go.
I wanted him to visit me in my dreams and tell me that he was okay,  but I knew that because he went so unexpected, that it might take a while for him to come. Well, in the end he did come to me in my dreams and it was just as I had hoped it would be -- nothing spectacular, just him smiling and looking as healthy as I had hoped he would be. That is when I realized that it didn't take him so long to come because he wasn't ready, but because I wasn't ready.

I did not have a funeral to go to and I did not get to say goodbye. The get-well balloons and the I love you were too late, so I was stuck without closure and with my guilt.
I never questioned whether or not he loved me; that was without a doubt something that I always knew, but there were other things that bothered me and I didn't understand them.
I thought about Dad everyday and I still do and after reading more books and talking to people, I started to understand him better. The more I understood the less guilt I felt until one night he finally came.
I woke up lighthearted and at first, I didn't know why. Then I remembered my dream and it was as if a weight lifted off me. I was so grateful for that feeling because it has been hard to miss him.
I know now that he is happy and that he is finally at peace and only feeling love; it makes me happy to know that he at least now sees Mia and can watch over her.

Till we meet again Dad. 

Saturday, September 6, 2014

The Naked Tooth Fairy

I wanted my kids to believe in Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny for a long time but I didn't want them to get laughed at by the kids who didn't believe anymore, so I told them that I was the helper for these imaginary beings.  Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny couldn't make it to every house so I volunteered to help them. They bought it for a long time until my mother-in-law, unfortunately, let the cat out of the bag on Santa and then I had serious damage control. I wanted my kids to believe because, for one thing, it always was a good excuse when they wanted something and also it was fun to watch them get all excited and giddy. It's all fun and games until the naked Tooth Fairy comes to town.
Enya loses teeth like an ultimate fighter. I swear I can't keep up with her but that is no excuse for forgetting the tooth under the pillow when your kid still believes. Just to explan the sitch. I sleep in the nude because I don't like to get strangeld by my nightgown in the middle of the night. After I got all tucked in and was half asleep I realized that I hadn't swapped the tooth for money under Enya's pillow so I crept downstairs in the buff and stuck my arm under her pillow (she had a bunkbbed at this time).  I had to stand on my toes with my arm all the way up to my armpit under her pillow digging for that damn tooth like a  gold digger and I couldn't find the damned thing.
I just kept thinking, "Please don't let her wake up; I will never live this down." and luckily she didn't, and since then there have been no more visits from the naked Tooth Fairy.
By now, Enya knows that I am the Tooth Fairy but she still expects her money.  Now when I forget to put money under her pillow, I just tell her to remind me -- kind of takes the magic out of it but what the hell, I have Mia I can play fairytale creatures with.

A Day in the Life

I found a cool idea on a website called Jones Design Company  where she took a picture every hour to document her day. It looked like a cool idea so I did that today, and while my day was super busy it now looks like the last 3 hours I have done nothing but sit on my ass.
6:00am I was tired.
7:00am The kids left for school.
8:00am Mia was watching cartoons while I made our breakfast, which was scrambled eggs.
9:00am I'm dressed and even have makeup on.

10:00am I am at the hardware store getting stuff to paint the nightstands; they've been my project for a while. 
11:00am Still running around at the grocery store and pharmacy but Mia has animal crackers so she is happy.
12:00pm Putting away all the stuff I bought.
1:00pm Starting lunch, which is a pain, because I am making two separate meals again in hopes of getting better at eating clean. I made Gnocchi Alfredo that smelled so good I licked one of Mia's Gnocchi but I didn't eat it!
2:00pm We sat down to eat.
3:00pm Joshua and I cleaned the kitchen.
4:00pm I continued to sand the nightstands that I am hopefully painting this weekend.
5:00pm I decided to take the feet off so my FIL came over to help me with some tools and then helped me in the yard.
6:00pm Putting the bike seat for Mia on my bike; now she doesn't want to sit in it even though she ran around with her helmet on her head for an hour.
7:00pm I sat down with coffee and my ipad while Mia watched Barbie.
8:00pm I started to write this post but ended up quitting because I have stuff to do. 
9:00pm I finally took my makeup off and put my sweats on.

Week Recap



This is where I spent my ladies' night, at the OEG City Beach and Neckarstrand.
It looks like somewhere in the tropics, doesn't it?
You would never know that it is Mannheim where some people are rude, attack you verbally, threaten to call the police and call you stupid cow, while you are sitting in your car waiting for your friend.
I wish I could have maced that asshole but I didn't have any on me.
So, here you see me with my roots done feeling good about myself with my hair all pretty, until I got home and realized that I had a huge hole in my skirt, right where my ass is, and I had flower underpants on. WTF?
I washed this H&M skirt one time, and afterwards it had 10 little holes in it, but I sure as hell didn't see the gargantuan hole in the back!
This is what our dinner looks like. When I am cleaning out the fridge, nothing goes togehter but everything tastes good by itself.
I also made a garlic/pizza bread with ready-made pizza dough; I rubbed olive oil on it, Italian seasoning and garlic salt, put it in the oven for 15 minutes in the oven and it's done. 
It's a great dipping bread.

I let Mia run through the sprinkler and she loved it! Even though she looks mad in this picture, she had a blast. 
Tomorrow will be an exciting day with family, so I will be busy taking pictures, cooking food and just hanging out with the fam. 
Talk to you tomorrow.

Friday, September 5, 2014

The Last Year in my Thirties

The last year in my thirties has officially started and I am stoked.
Yesterday was pretty laid back with almost no company and that was just fine for me. I don't need a party this year. 
Family and a couple of friends and a whole lotta people on facebook wished me a Happy Birthday.

A couple of things to mention here.
I made out like a bandit this year from the Family, talk about being a spoiled brat.
The Husband bought me the watch I wanted.
My hair looks like shit, damn hormones
My brother said I was a nasty old lady and that my face was keeping the bugs away.
I don't know what he is talking about this picture is perfect. 
My sister skyped me in her red neck jammies which was awesome but then my mom kept saying how pretty she is and I am sitting there with makeup on feeling like chopped liver. 
I'm kidding, No I'm not I hate her. They never wanted me. 
I made the kids do whatever I wanted all day and they tried really hard not to complain. 
I told mom not to bring anything that I could kill and she brought flowers. 
I didn't cook because I was tired so I ate crackers with cheese and a piece of cake that I didn't bake just defrosted. This spread was not pinterest worthy let me tell you. 
We had to hide the musical birthday card from Mia because she wouldn't stop playing the damn thing. 
The best part of the day was when I got to go to bed. 
I still laughed like always. 

Next year will be a whole different Ball game because I am turning 40 in New York