Sunday, March 24, 2013

Looking like the other white meat

I know that when I am tan, I automatically look healthier and skinnier, my teeth look whiter, and my zits are all gone (just like every other human I know)!  I also know that tanning makes you look old in the face, gives you skin cancer, and dries out your skin like nobody's business.  Starting out in my teens and until a couple of years ago, I was a hardcore tanner -- burning myself to a crisp and thinking it would go faster by just applying baby oil.
The smell of Hawaiian Tropic suntan oil was, to me, the epitome of summer even if that meant being bored out of mind lying in the sun for hours.
Skin cancer? Isn't that something that old people get? When I started working, I didn't have time to lay out all day so I started to go to the tanning salons, where I could burn in an environment that, not only made you stink like a burned chicken, but could also give you skin fungi that you would never get rid of, no matter how hard you tried. I would lay in those suckers with my butt up in the air (so I wouldn't get those weird lines under my butt) and I still managed to fall asleep. I would get my base tan and after that, go twice a week to keep it up. Never mind that it was expensive; it was a necessity!  I tanned for years and years until I noticed that I had a lot of freckles that then turned into big brown spots all over my body;  I thought they were OK -- they didn't really bother me that much until I started to get pigmentation spots on my face.  I would get really dark around my mouth so that it looked like I had a mustache.  

When I started to be more careful about tanning, I started out with baby steps, only lying in the shade till about 5 pm; then I'd lay out in the sun till 6pm putting SPF 60 around my mouth so I wouldn't look like Burt Reynolds and putting SPF 50 on the rest of my body so I wouldn't burn. I still did; I ain't kidding anybody. 

That all changed when I became pregnant with Mia; I had a routine checkup at the Dermatologist's and she recommended doing a mole check on the really dark ones that I had. Of course, she found something.......hadn't I been abusing my skin for years?........ Like I had a spare one in the trunk?  I had as many as 12 moles that had to be cut out and sewn shut because they were so deep. 
When I got the results back, the doctor told me she was glad that she had decided to cut a little deeper because it was the beginning stages of skin cancer. 
The doctor told me that I was not ever to tan and to stay out of the sun as much as possible because now I was a "high risk" and I needed to take it seriously.   
Let me just say that I hate it. I hate being white and flabby; it is so disgusting and does not look pretty at all. But it is better than the alternative so I stay out of direct sun as much as possible.   There are times when I slip up and don't think the sun is as  bad as it is, and I end up being burnt a little, but I am working on it.
The funny thing is, I am an absolute fanatic when it comes to the kids and sunscreen. I slather them so thick in the stuff that they look like little Caspers; I make them wear shirts in the water when I see just a hint of pink, but with myself I don't worry so much. 

Before you ask:  I have tried tanning lotion but I suck at it and it looks worse than white.  This weekend  I actually went to a cosmotoligst who recommended a nice tanning oil that would make my face look sunkissed.  Okay, sunkissed if I was Pocohantas!  That shit darkend over night and I ended up looking like Ross in friends when he got stuck in the spray tan booth.
I am a work in progress, and I will find something that makes me feel comfortable and still look good, I am sure of it. 

Friday, March 15, 2013

Random likes

This week has been kind of busy which is the way I like it I guess you could say good stress. I had it set in my head that I would be doing all kinds of painting and renovating but I decided against it when it started snowing and my spring fever went away over night but I am getting new furniture today so that is exciting even thought I am putting it against the poop brown wall that has been there for the last 6 years. I really need to change that and I have the perfect inspiration too just need to get it done.

Yes I plan on painting my living room wall black. But it was too much trouble to get everything painted white first and then black and move all the furniture so I am going to wait till Spring has really sprung and not whatever this weather is supposed to be. Faking me out what the hell? I do have some awesome new pictures from my friend Babette Laesser Photography. Go ahead and check her out.

I love the look on Joshuas face it kills me everythime I look at it. 

In other news I have to tell you about a great movie I watched yesterday it was different then I expected but it was a really good movie and I it reminded me a little of some of my favorite 80's movies by John Hughes


What at first looks like a teenie movie turns in to something so much darker and tragic but still hopeful and at times hilarious. 

Definitely check it out.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Chocolate covered Pretzels

I love chocolate covered anything, but I really love pretzels coated in dark chocolate because it makes me happy to stuff my face like a hog, and at the same time I tell myself that dark chocolate doesn't have as many calories.
There are all kinds of recipes on the internet but they pretty much all want you to add shortening;  I think that is gross so I make it with just chocolate.
A lot of recipes tell you to melt your chocolate in the microwave, but I prefer to melt it in a double broiler; there is nothing worse than burnt chocolate!
I use a small pot in a big pot.  Make sure the water doesn't boil too much because you do not want water in the chocolate.

Keep stirring and take it slow.

I just poured the pretzels in the chocolate and pulled them out with a toothpick. I then put them on a cookie sheet with non stick paper until the chocolate was dry.
You could add white chocolate or sprinkles or just keep them plain, the way I like them.


Sunday, March 3, 2013

Mia the destroyer

My little angel Mia has taken it upon herself to break my ipad. Right after it happened it reminded me of that Skit from Jeff Foxworthy where his mother complained that it was impossible to have nice things. Jeff and his Brother had just broken the sacred Elvis Jack Daniels decanter.
While this was nothing quite as redneck my ipad was a gift and I was really upset when it didn't work. I immediately got the shakes like a junkie when I thought of how much I depended on that thing and what I would do without it.
As far as I can tell I will be able to get it fixed which I am going to do for sure but last night as I was lying in bed having to fall asleep without reading my new book that I had just bought for the Ipad I thought of things that I could do now that I don't have my beloved Ipad.
 1.) Discover a country. ( Probably not going to do that it's to cold outside)

2.) Clean ( Probably will do that for a while till I hate it)

3.) Finally rearrange Enya's room she has been begging me to do that for a while ( that means declutter till the cows come home)

4.)Getting some sewing done now that I can't spend every free moment on the web.  (Yes I still have a little laptop but I can't play any games on it so that will save loads of time.)

5.) Reading the Newspaper again ( usually just read people online and scan the paper for important stuff)

6.) Write more on the Blog ( used to have blogger on the Ipad but it didn't work right)

7.) I started to write down my recipes on cards because looking them up on the Ipad was a pain maybe I will finish that now

8.) I bought the Jillian Michaels 30 day Shred but have only doen it once because I peed myself the whole time but maybe I will start that again.

9.) Go outside once it's not colder then all get out. Like today.

10.) Do crack