Monday, December 30, 2013

2014 is gonna be my bitch

I said it! I am gonna own this year like none other before.
I am going to fulfill my wishes and stick with my goals, and if I only accomplish half of what I set out to do then I will own that too.
I already cut out 90% of the stuff that eats up my time so there is nothing standing in my way to  creating something, anything, even if it's a macaroni necklace dammit!
2013 was, with one huge exception, a fairly decent year; it had its usual ups and downs and minor annoyances that are everyday stuff, but all in all pretty awesome.

Oma and Opa came to visit

I got to visit my sister and family

My kids are healthy and fairly well adjusted; they are a little weird but I blame that on their fathers. That's right... I said it!  In this house everyone gets their own Dad; ain't nobody got time for sharing. 
I got my house in decent shape, even organizing my Christmas stuff, which has always been a little pain in my ass.
I managed to go on almost all my girls nights this year, which really helped me stay sane a lot of times. We have big plans for next year, and I am as excited as the headless hunter on Halloween.
I'm still married.  Lucky him -- I am a real catch.

I went on 3 vacations this year.

I finished my project this year of 31 Days of going outside even though I disliked it immensely; I still count it as a positive thing because, without it, my list is too short.

I finally tackled my terrace, which has been ugly since we moved in; now it's still ugly but a decent ugly.

After two years, I finally got all my credit cards, passport, social security card changed to my married name.  At least I took a decent passport picture even if it made my head look huge.

So my resolutions for the New Year are few but definitely doable:
1) Craft and sew more
2) Learn something new (like parallel parking)
3) Stop holding my farts in. I'm married for God's sake; I blame it on my brother.
4) Travel to at least 2 countries
5) Quit talking bad about myself 
6) Try to be nicer to strangers and maybe people who know me.
7) Take better care of myself
8) Get a Llama
9) Paint my living room
10) Drink more wine

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Christmas 2013

What started out rough and tiring ended with a hospital visit, and I'm still tired. What is it with kids choosing the holidays to get sick? Do they sit around and plot about how they will get sick when their parents have a ton of stuff to do (or in Daddy's case, are hung over!) and that they will use exactly that opportunity to be really cuddly and clingy?  Someone had too much Christmas cheer in our house Christmas Eve; a contributing factor could be the three sleepless nights that came before; I will always have the memory of him sitting down on the floor with Mia and her Hello Kitty teacups, right after he announced he was going to throw up. Aaahh, the memories just warm my heart. So, back to the festivities in our house; they were pretty relaxed and uneventful as, in every year, the kids lit a candle at church for all of the loved ones who have passed away; this was the first time we lit one for my dad. I cried whenever I had to pass the church these last few weeks because I knew that we were going to light one for him. I like to think that maybe he saw it and knows we are thinking about him always.
Afterwards, we opened presents and this year The Hubs and I decided not to give ourselves anything . . . . I didn't care for it at all.

Unfortunately, the day after Christmas, which is still a holiday in Germany, was spent in the hospital with Mia because she has had a fever for almost 4 days now.  We realized it was not going away so we went to the emergency room and spent almost 4 hours trying to get a toddler to pee so they could rule out a bladder infection.
Getting a toddler to pee when you want her to is like winning the lottery -- its effing impossible! We did everything: running water, tickling, poking her stomach, the pee pee dance... nothing worked so they finally had to lay a catheter. The good news is that it is not a bladder infection but the bad news is that she has an infection that is highly contagious and we are probably all going to get it.  Merry Christmas!!
If you were at my house anytime in the last 4 days, I apologize in advance if you get sick.  It's not my fault; blame it on Santa!
I am getting ready to write down my New Year's resolutions and I will post my plans and Do's and Don'ts for New Years.

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Even better than the real thing

This explains me perfectly and of course I am misunderstood a lot of times whenever I feel the need to document everything we do.
99% of the time I am behind the camera taking pictures or videos of vacation,Birthdays,Christmas or even just going to the park. I sit there for hours afterwards editing and making videos that only last a couple of minutes at most and of course it is not something that is necessary but it is important to me.
I catch myself a lot of times closing my eyes and telling myself to remember what I feel like just at that moment, to remember how I feel so I can bring it back later when I am sad or need a reminder of how fast time flies. Unfortunately it doesn't always work that way so I am grateful that I took the time to take a picture of the kids especially when it is so easy with Instagram and Cellphones nowadays to document everything. Of course there is a downside to always taking all the pictures which is I am rarely in any of them but that is something that I am working on.  Maybe this Christmas will be different.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Do's and Don'ts

This week has been the usual fun-packed week with useful lessons that are good to have, so I will share them with you in the hopes that you learn from my mistakes. 

Do let your daughter try out makeup and experiment with eyeshadow even if she looks like Mike Tyson afterwards. 
Don't let her take off her eye makeup with nail polish removal pads. 
Do wake her up after you realized what she did to make sure she isn't blind.

Do turn off the doorbell so the baby can take a nap
Don't confuse it with the switch from the heater then shut the damned thing off that, by the way, also supplies your hot water.

Do buy seamless underwear that leave no marks whatsoever under clothes.
Don't wear them insideout and sometimes even backwards at the same time because you can't tell how they go on. 

Do hang up colored lights with white ones
Do go for a walk everyday, even though its cold outside
Don't think you are going to have a toddler who stays in her stroller the whole time even though you put a hot water bottle in with her.
Do make your kid wear funny hats; it really helps you stay calm if they have a dog on their head while  they act like little a-holes.
Do plan to make all kinds of new foods that you have never made before for your guests on Christmas Day.
Do be convinced that everything will be perfect because the Pioneer Woman said so.
Don't be upset when it isn't perfect; after all, it's only family coming over and as long as you don't kill them, it's considered a success.

Don't expect traditions to continue even though your dad is gone.
Do be really happy when they do!
                                                                 Thanks Oma Vicki
Do make fun of your kid when he takes pictures like this.
Do post them on your blog so everybody can see how funny he is. 
Do also post awesome pictures of him
Do take medical advice from your sister.
Don't feel bad when she tells you why it itches.

Do have only one more egg in the house and decide to make Brownies with it.
Don't eat the brownies.

Do tell everyone that December will be packed with all kinds of interesting things to blog about.
Don't get upset when, instead, you don't write at all.
Do let yourself be sad.
Don't eat your feelings.
Don't sweat the small stuff. 
Do laugh at yourself as much as possible; everybody else is.
Don't take that last one seriously.


Sunday, December 8, 2013

Week Recap

I realized that I didn't write about coming home from my trip, probably because I was sad to go and was not looking forward to the long trip home but as usual I survived. I say that like it's a bad thing 

I had a lot of fun on my trip and we really did a lot in those seven days, which took my mind off missing the kids; I was glad to come home even though after two days of being home I felt like I never left.
Cleaning, cooking, laundry and appointments have a way of bringing you right back to real life and reminding you that your vacation is over.  Everything ran smoothly at home. The only thing the kids told me was that they were bored while I was gone, so I guess the entertainment is my job. (or making fun of me keeps them happy).
This Friday was Nikolaus and the first time that Mia could put her boot outside to see if St. Nick would bring her something.  This meant I had to go through the garage, fill all the boots, knock on the door, and hide, while at the same time taking pictures.
She didn't seem too impressed and at first she didn't want to walk outside because it was cold, but eventually she did, and ended up eating too much candy and staying awake till eleven at night.
Today we went to the park and fed the animals, which was nice because even though it was overcast and chilly, it didn't rain and it felt good to be in the fresh air. 
I have been thinking about different things to write about and maybe having a weekly plan, but I won't be starting that till the New Year, because in order to the do that, I will have to give up something else which I am having a hard time doing.

Saturday, November 30, 2013


Thanksgiving was a very laid back, lazy holiday for me and that's probably because I didn't do anything except make the gravy, which took a total of 5 minutes. My sister cooked everything by herself and I just watched. I have serious jet lag which makes me a little sluggish if I don't get out of the house so if I lay around I feel totally worthless. The morning started out with our doing our nails with 10 pounds of glitter that came off all day long.

We watched T.V and snacked all day till it was time to eat dinner and then pigged out again. I was so stuffed I wanted to explode, but it was so good. 

After the kitchen was clean we got dressed and went to see the movie "Catching Fire".
I loved it but I didn't love that the people decided to go to the movies at 8:00pm with their small children even infants. It was loud and violent and these dumbass people have babies there.
We decided to head to Kohls, but after we saw the line that went through the whole store, we just decided to scratch that whole idea.
All in all, it was a great Thanksgiving with good food and great company.

Friday, November 29, 2013

The Day before the Hunger Games

Since I haven't had a Thanksgiving in 10 years or longer, I forgot how busy and hectic it can be and how nuts everyone gets when they think they might not have everything they need.. How can you sell out of pie pumpkins? Who the hell takes the time to cut that fat-ass thing up? 
After running for my life across the parking lot, I felt right at home with the other crazies who were pushing carts full of food, flowers, and beer.
We started out our day going to breakfast in this little hole-in-the-wall with great breakfast food. We don't have anything like this in Germany so I have to take advantage when I get the chance.
Later on that day after looking at 5000 Christmas ornaments, we went to watch Jolie ride her favorite horse Charlie. Charliehorse!!! Get it?
That kids legs are as long as Charlie's and just as skinny.

In the evening we watched mean tweets and hashtag videos on youtube and baked cookies, which was interesting, because Dan ate our hazelnuts and we didn't have enough for the cookies so they looked like little piles of poop. It is called improvised baking and we were masters last night.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving so we will be as busy as a one-armed paper hanger.
Talk to you tomorry . . .

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

In the Land of Round Doorknobs

My flight to the states was very uneventful which is always a good thing because the alternative is usually enough to push me over the edge and ain't nobody got time for that. I watched a ton of movies and listened to music until the weird dinner came and then just thought about what I would do once I got to the states.  
Arriving in Dallas was as chaotic as I remember it being and surprisingly, crappy weather-wise with very cloudy skies; what I didn't know was that Dallas had cancelled loads of flights because of bad weather but as you can see there was no snow anywhere.
I had my times all mixed up so instead of a an additional 2 hour flight it was only a 1 hour flight to NM filled with the pilot's fun facts about Thanksgiving, including that the Israelis eat the most turkey. Everyone is a comedian but Captain Willy was kind of funny so I was entertained.
The next morning we started out with pedicures, which was hilarious because every time I go somewhere with my sister it ends up being a total adventure.
Not only did I get fabulous nails but I also ripped out the coat rack and flipped my styrofoam flips flops over and almost fell in the store. I didn't realize that I would have to wear these ridiculous shoes because the nice little Asian lady didn't want me to put on my socks. Of course that went well. Have I mentioned that I already fell out of the truck getting in? I am a danger to myself and if you are too close to me also to others.

 I went outside like this. If the Germans could see me now they would have a kannipschen.
After shopping, shopping and eating we had to take Winnie the Diva Dog to the vet to have her ears checked ,which she did not take kindly to.
After the kids came home from school we hung around the house a little bit and then went to have hamburgers at a place called Fve Guys. At first I was confused because I don't usually like places where I have to get my own food (shut up I am spoiled!) but these burgers and fries were really good.

These kids are killing me......they are just like their Auntie. I laugh just watching them being silly and looking at Jolie is like looking in a mirror.

This poor kid had to look at nail polish with me but he did it and was very helpful; I have never seen him in a bad mood.
Joshua made me promise him that I would go to Walmart so I made Sam take a picture of us there, which is funny because the only thing that you can see is the Walmart logo.